Thursday, August 30, 2012

One Woman's Road To Self-Discovery.....


Subtitled
Dude, There I Am!


After her great speech last night at the Republican National Convention, you might think the title of this post refers to Susana Martinez, the Governor of New Mexico.  After all, she regaled the convention crowd with the story of how she changed her party affiliation from Democrat to Republican in 1995, after a discussion with a couple of Republican acquaintances.  It was a powerful moment in her life, realizing that her values and ideas meant the Republican Party should be her political home.  You would be wrong.....

You might think your stalwart, common sense Crew has suddenly blossomed into some metaphysical wingnut, interested only in helping others reach a higher plane of awareness.  You would be wrong again....

Dateline: Reykjavik, Iceland

A group of approximately 50 people spent hours searching the Icelandic countryside near Eldgja (what is with these people and consonants?) Canyon over the weekend for a missing member of a tour group.  An Asian woman had been reported missing after the tour bus made a brief refreshment stop.  Dozens of people joined the search on foot and using vehicles to scour the rugged landscape.  Plans for an air search via helicopter were put into motion.

The search was called off around 3am when the woman was found......amongst the search party!  During the tour stop, she had changed clothes and was not recognized by the others once the tour got under way again. Hearing that someone was missing, the woman enthusiastically joined the search....for herself.  Hours later, it dawned on her that maybe Barack Obama was right when he said "we are the ones we've been looking for!".  She informed the authorities that she was in fact fine and dandy, and the whole ridiculous circus was called off.  I've got two words for that tour operator-  head and count.

This story should finally lay to rest the offensive notion that "all Asians look alike".  Hell, they don't even look like themselves.


Wednesday, August 29, 2012

Must Watch-- Dennis Miller Takes Leno To The Woodshed


I like Jay Leno.  His stand-up material away from the bright lights of the Tonight Show is terrific.  Unfortunately, Jay is a charter member in the Barack Obama Cult of Personality.  He has drank the Kool-Aid, and is sure that Dear Leader has this all-encompassing compassion for "average people".  If only the Republicans would show some of that Jay often laments.

Watch this two part video as Leno's long time friend Dennis Miller schools Jay on Obama and the "war on women" being waged by the right.

PART 1




PART 2





Tuesday, August 28, 2012

Chicago: the New Beirut


Signs that the Chicago Gun Turn-In was not successful were evident over the weekend. In continuation of what can only be called an orgy of violence, nine people were murdered and 37 were injured in Chicago over the weekend. Unsurprisingly, Mayor Ramen Noodle Emanuel called for Illinois "to pass stronger gun laws in this state." Again unsurprisingly showing a total lack of knowledge (or being intentionally deceitful) about the Illinois gun laws he said, "We're not talking about repealing conceal/ carry, but making sure we have a tougher set of laws dealing with assault weapons and other types of guns."

 Uh Rahm, just an FYI... Illinois is the only state out of all 57 that specifically bans carrying concealed guns. I guess maybe he meant that they wouldn't change the law to lift the ban.

 Contrast that story with this one from Jacksonville, Florida. A 57 year old grandfather with a concealed carry permit shot a killed an armed robber at a Dollar General Store and drove off his accomplice.

 So lets do the math shall we? A city in a state with the country's most restrictive gun laws is experiencing uncontrolled violence and mayhem. How many more robberies do you think Jacksonville Dollar General Stores can expect in the near future? My guess is not many.

 Is Rahm's solution arming citizens so they protect themselves? Not exactly... "I'd like to remind everybody that it also requires a community to step up," Emanuel said Monday at an unrelated press conference. "You're not a snitch, you have a role in community policing."

 Yes devoted readers one of Obama's closest friends and former adviser's strategy is to rat out that gang-banger, dope-dealer, pimp that is shooting up your neighborhood. But don't you dare carry a concealed gun to protect yourself, or Chicago's finest will be coming after you.

Monday, August 27, 2012

Monday Musings With The Crew



  • My oldest son and I went down to the office of our county assessor last week.  I am transferring the title of a truck to him, and in order for him to license it he needed a personal property tax statement.  Since he is 20, and up to this point has owned no taxable personal property, I figured it would be a proverbial piece of baklava!  Wrongo bureaucracy breath!  What he needed is called a "Statement of Non-Assessment", basically a document stating he has had no personal property and owes no tax.  We walked up to the empty counter, and tremulously faced the 4 old crones sitting on stools on the other side.  When told what we needed, the hag-in-chief smirked and said we had to prove that we actually needed the document, we weren't just entitled to documentation proving he owed no tax.  I thought, "Hmmm, conservative blogger massacres 4 in assessor's office".  When we dutifully provided the "justification" for our request (the title of the vehicle), the sacred document was grudgingly supplied to us.  I said to my son as left the counter, "can't wait until she's in charge of my healthcare".  
Instead of 21 years, how about
21 seconds in front of a firing squad?
  • Say, how about that Norwegian justice system?  Anders Breivik received a 21 year sentence in an Oslo court last week.  Let's see, that works out to just under 100 days for each of the 77 people he murdered last year.  The Helsinki Committee for Human Rights calls the ridiculously lenient sentence "a triumph for human rights".  I sure am glad this country is not a path to become more like Europe.  
  • Remember going to those wild parties in your youth?  Somebody always got into a fight, and usually 3-4 other beer-soaked teenagers would join in.  A few bloody noses and scraped knuckles and you'd call it good, right?  Well, not if you are a follower of the religion of peace.  A party in Afghanistan (now there's a malaprop for ya!) was broken up by radical Islamic insurgents.  The night's festivities ended with the beheading of 17 party-goers.  Now I don't know about you, but that seems a tad drastic.
  • I saw this headline at Foxnews.com....."Grandmother gives birth to own grandson".  I quickly pulled up the article and was very disappointed to read that it had absolutely nothing to do with Morgan Freeman.  Just some Portland granny carrying her daughter's child through a surrogacy.  I still think Morgan had something to do with it.

  • It appears that the British royal family has patched things up as they have just released their new official portrait.......

  • Addendum:  After completing this post, I was reading a story about protesters at the Republican convention in Tampa.  One of the protesters is Cara Jennings, described as a "voter outreach organizer".  Here's a quiz....how do you know if you are a complete and total wingnut with no redeeming societal value?  Answer:  When you have this sentence written about you in a major American newspaper....."Jennings, who wore a pink, neck to knees vagina outfit decorated with sparkles, said she was protesting the GOP's position on abortion rights."

Friday, August 24, 2012

Hollywood HOs Winner Waves his Royal Scepter

Hollywood HOs

The decision on this week's Hollywood HOs winner came down to two stories about stripping.  One sad, Lance Armstrong being stripped of his seven Tour De France titles, and one markedly funnier story.  I went with the funny one.  I know that technically his is not part of the Hollywood gliterati, but his picture has graced numerous entertainment magazines and shows.  In fact, his latest published pictures are all the rage.  Without further adieu, I would like to congratulate Prince Harry as this week's Hollywood HOs winner.

For anyone who has been living under a rock this week, Prince Harry was photographed "au naturale" with a similarly clad woman recently at a party in Las Vegas.

NOT the picture from Vegas

I would like to make it clear to our devoted readers that while not condoning Prince Harry's actions, his antics have not produced the loathing and disdain that I hold for the majority of Hollywood HOs winners. He won this week's award purely on the amusement that his story has provided me.

There is however; a silver lining for young Prince Harry over all of this.  His, shall we say, pictorial aura was so impressive that a representative for Chippendales in in Las Vegas has offered him a job as guest host.  The rep was quoted as saying, "We figured that since he seems to enjoy taking his clothes off in Las Vegas, why not do it on stage at the #1 Male Revue in the World."


I bet the queen is doing cartwheels.

**Editor's note**  The post title was a Crew original and not mine.  I loved it so much I had to use it.

Thursday, August 23, 2012

Atheists Want to Starve Children!

This would be the New York Times headline if you replaced "atheists" with "Christians" 


According to multiple news sources, the Wisconsin based Freedom from Religion Foundation, or FFRF (I find it ironic that their acronym sounds just like the noise I make when I've eaten too much spicy food), has sent a letter to the superintendent of Walker County Schools in Georgia demanding an investigation into the behavior of Ridgeland High School football coach Mark Mariakis.

Coach Mariakis has been holding forced baptisms in the team whirlpools and branding all his players with the image of the cross and the words "John 3:16".  Wait, I'm sorry.  I must have read that wrong.  Apparently, local churches of varying denominations have been providing dinners for the football team on game-days. Whoa!  This guy makes Jerry Sandusky look like a saint.  He's allowing churches to feed his players for free????  The monster!

The FFRF purpose is to "protect the constitutional principle of separation between state and church".  In a quote from a Fox News article“Taking public school football teams to church, even for a meal, is unconstitutional,” wrote FFRF attorney Andrew Seidel. “This program is an egregious violation of the Establishment Clause and must cease immediately.”

For those of you who civics class was more than a year or two ago, here is the text of the first amendment of the US Constitution:
Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof; or abridging the freedom of speech, or of the press; or the right of the people peaceably to assemble, and to petition the Government for a redress of grievances.
Now as many times as I have heard "separation of church and state", I have never been able to find that text in the first amendment or anywhere else in the constitution for that matter.  The only thing I see is that congress isn't supposed to make any laws creating or establishing a religion.  I struggle to understand how allowing a variety of different churches to feed your football team has anything to to with congress making a law.  Maybe some of our liberal constitutional scholar (wow, is that an oxymoron or what?) readers can enlighten me.

Otherwise, I am left with only one conclusion.  Atheists want to starve our children. 

Monday, August 20, 2012

Monday Musings With The Crew


Never let it be said that the Crew ignores the foibles and peccadillos of those on the right......


  • The Senate campaign of Congressman Todd Akin (R-MO) crashed and burned on the abortion highway over the weekend.  Asked about aborting pregnancies caused by rape, the St. Louis conservative said that pregnancy is very rare in instances of rape...."If it's a legitimate rape, the female body has ways to try and shut that whole thing down".  The subsequent yowling from the "women's issues" crowd was predictable and deafening.  Look, I don't know why in the world Akin would say something so stupid, except that he is just another tone-deaf career politician.  That's why I didn't vote for him in the GOP primary!  
  • Next up we have my favorite headline of the year, courtesy of the Kansas City Star....  "Congressman Yoder Apologizes for Swimming Nude in the Sea of Galilee".  The story refers to Congressman Kevin Yoder, (R-KS) who apparently took a quick skinny dip in the storied waters of Galilee in August of 2011 during a "private fact-finding" trip to the area.  No word on whether Yoder swam beneath the surface, or just walked across it.  Apparently, the simple act of being elected to Congress causes an immediate 50 point drop in IQ.  I am looking forward to seeing the Yoder incident on the next "Congressmen Gone Wild" DVD.  The gruesome details are available here.

Time for him to meet Allah
  • It's been almost 3 years since Muslim terrorist Nidal Hasan murdered 13 people, and wounded another 30 in the Fort Hood incident.  Hasan still has not been tried for his crimes, the latest reason is that Hasan refuses to shave his beard.  ARE YOU KIDDING ME????  If the military courts want him clean-shaven at his trial, strap his ass down and shave his disgusting face!  Leaving the victims and their families twisting in the wind while this piece of pond scum games the system is unconscionable.  Even better, let's just drag him out behind the prison and deliver a brass verdict to the back of his cowardly skull.  I volunteer for the mission.  
  • Plagues of locusts and rivers running red with blood are surely coming soon now that the Augusta National Golf Club has accepted its first two female members.  Augusta has finally caved to the incessant braying of the left, and turned its back on its own 80 years of tradition.  Nothing against the two new female members, Condoleeza Rice and Darla Moore, but I disagree with Augusta National chairman Billy Payne's characterization of the decision as a "joyous occasion".  I think it is just another sad skirmish in the war on men.  In related news, the first annual WHAMO golf tournament will now no longer be held at Augusta National as previously scheduled.  Sahib and I are searching for an alternate site.
  • I'm always interested to hear what DNC chairwoman Debbie Wasserman-Schulz has to say about current events.  Here is a short clip of her latest comments on the Romney-Ryan ticket.......frankly she's never been more lucid or lovely!
video

Sunday, August 19, 2012

Moscow Rocked By Pussy Riot!

For everyone's safety, the Pussy Riot was confined
to a glass cage during the trial


In the midst of  my usual 5 minutes of research for a post, I learned to my chagrin that "Pussy Riot" was a band, not an event.  Although that took a little of the luster off a few of my puns, I decided to soldier on like the busy little beaver I am.  

Yeah, Weiner Riot is
probably more his thing
Formed in Moscow about a year ago, Pussy Riot is prone to giving impromptu feminist punk rock performances, usually in protest of Russian President Vladimir Putin.  In February of this year, they did just that in a Russian Orthodox Cathedral in Moscow.  Shortly after breaking into a little ditty called "Mother of God, Put Putin Away", bandmembers were led out by church officials.  

Three bandmembers were arrested in March, and on June 4 were officially charged in an indictment that ran 2,800 pages!  The Moscow Prosecuting Attorney, Nanciya Pelosivitch, commented that "we will have to have the trial to see what is in the indictment".  

In a decision reached at the end of last week, Pussy Riot has been convicted of "committing hooliganism driven by religious hatred" and sentenced to 2 years in prison.  The trial was marked by witnesses accusing the three women of "devilish dances".  No information has been made available as to why the town elders from Footloose were testifying in the trial of a Russian fem-punk band.  

The conviction and sentence has sparked great outrage among Western musicians including Madonna, Sir Paul McCartney, and Bjork among others.  Websites like freepussyriot.org are clamoring for the band's release.  Again, please note before clicking that link...."pussy riot" is a musical group, NOT an event, violent gathering, or other group activity.  Just trying to look out for my readers.....


Friday, August 17, 2012

Lesbian Cabal At Homeland Security?

Two weeks ago in this space, I asked a simple rhetorical question......"Dude, Where's My Lesbian?".  Apparently the answer is the Department of Homeland Security.  Everyone's favorite self-described single, straight workaholic Janet Napolitano and a couple of her gal pals have had quite the party atmosphere over at DHS.

The head of the New York Office of Immigration and Customs Enforcement (ICE), James Hayes, has filed a lawsuit alleging "anti-male discrimination" and a "lewd working environment" at ICE.  Now Congress is getting into the act, with Rep. Mitch McCaul looking into the matter.  There's really nothing new here, just a couple more Democrats treating the federal government as their personal playground.  Word is that Secretary Napolitano is considering resigning over the incident involving her confidantes Suzanne Barr and Dora Schirro.

It all seemed like just another glimpse of the slimy underbelly of the Obama Aministration, until this morning.  Early this morning on the Fox News Channel's show Fox and Friends, Geraldo Rivera wondered aloud if there was some sort of "lesbian cabal" running Homeland Security.  Of course that has thrown the LGBT community into a tizzy, apparently they have taken some time away from shooting up conservative think tanks to roundly criticize Rivera.  I for one want to thank Geraldo for introducing my new favorite phrase into the lexicon.  Seriously, just try to say "lesbian cabal" without smiling, I dare you.


Getting Out the Democrat Vote

I'm sure the gentleman with the stick is wearing a McCain/Palin button...

I was perusing the headlines this morning and an article on Fox News caught my attention.  The title was "Nonprofit raises eyebrows with mailings seeking to increase voter registration".  As I read the article, it was pretty much what I expected.  A group trying to get "underrepresented" voting blocks registered to vote.  Among these "underrepresented" blocks are pets and dead people which, in my opinion, truly are underrepresented groups.  This of course keeps with two core Democrat philosophies "Vote early, vote often" and the old Chicago and St. Louis standbys of "Get the dead out to vote".  All of this was of mild interest because it isn't anything new or surprising.  What caught my eye was the following description of the story:
"After voter registration forms sent to dead people, pets, critics say nonprofit trying to get more Democrats to vote."

My immediate thought was this:  After more than 3 1/2 years of Obama, these should be the only groups where votes could be found for Obama.

Tuesday, August 14, 2012

More Civil Discourse From The Obama-Biden Campaign

I thought I would check in with the Obama-Biden 2012 campaign today, just to see what sort of calm, reasoned, and civil discourse they were engaging in.  Vice-President Joe Biden was in Virginia where he said this about Romney and the Republicans to an audience containing numerous black Americans.......


I am really starting to get concerned.  I mean, how in the world am I going to accomplish all that is expected from a middle-aged white conservative man?  Just in the next few days I need to whack a couple grannies, steal food from the mouths of babes, molest a couple kids on an airplane (more about that tomorrow), and now I find out I have to chain up a bunch of blacks and ship'em back to the Congo.  Don't these people know I have a job?  What do they think I am, an Obama voter?

On a more serious note, Biden's comments today rank right up there with the most vile and repulsive things to spew forth from the Democrat campaign, and brother, that is saying something.  What has happened to my country?

Congressman Cleaver, Are You Ignorant Or Just A Pathologic Liar?


I'm so proud to be one of Congressman Emanuel Cleaver's constituents.  The Kansas City Democrat and chairman of the Congressional Black Caucus put this little gem up on his Facebook page today to celebrate the 77th anniversary of Social Security being signed into law........


Cleaver's comments on the occasion were as follows....

"Today is the 77th anniversary of Social Security being signed into law by President Franklin D. Roosevelt.  Now, 160 million workers are building toward a more secure retirement for themselves and their families through their contributions, and 55 million seniors, disable workers, widows and children currently rely on it for economic security each month."

There are only 2 explanations for this bit of progressive pablum.....either Emanuel Cleaver is the densest, most gullible person on Earth, OR, he thinks you are.  My bet is on the second choice.

Congressman Cleaver would STILL, after all these years, have you believe that your Social Security contributions are going into some magical vault, to be returned to you many times over upon your retirement. The only thing the SS contributions you make today are building is a more secure retirement for today's seniors, because that money is going right back out the door as fast as you can send it in (faster actually).

Depending on your current age, the people who will be "working to build YOUR more secure retirement" likely haven't even been born yet.  Let me think for a sec...there is a name for that kind of financial system, wait a minute, it's coming to me...........Oh yeah, now I remember.................................
Ponzi Scheme !!!!!!!!
You know, the same kind of thing that Bernie Madoff received a 150 year prison sentence for running.  Who knows, maybe if Congressman Cleaver keeps reneging on business loans he will someday get to compare notes with Mr. Madoff.  We can only hope.  





Monday, August 13, 2012

SACSTW Turns One Today!


One year ago today, Sahib and I crept timidly into the big, bad blogosphere.  We didn't know what to expect....I thought maybe we would run out of things to write about in a month or so.  Perhaps no one would read the blog, and it would just be something for Sahib and I to chuckle about.

As it turns out, we were wrong on both counts.  Today is the 261st post on SACSTW, thanks in large part to the perpetual inanity of the left.  Barack Obama, Harry Reid, and Nancy Pelosi keep teeing it up, and we just keep whacking it out of the park!  SACSTW has been read in 90 countries across the globe in the last year, and receives thousands of views each month.  I'd like to thank each and every reader who has visited SACSTW, and express our appreciation to great folks like Blazing Cat Fur and George Jarkesy who have helped SACSTW grow.

Although we are thrilled with how far SACSTW has come in one year, we are looking to get bigger and better in year 2.  To do that, we need your help.  If you read something you enjoy here, share it with your friends and family.  The easiest way to do that is via the Facebook share button at the bottom of each post.  Like us on Facebook, and you will get each new SACSTW post delivered right to your timeline.

 Know somebody you think would like what we do here?  Email them your favorite posts!  Heck, if you know someone who would hate what we do here, email them your favorite posts!  Please don't be shy about leaving comments on posts as well, even if you disagree with us!  We don't censor comments, and all opinions are welcome here at SACSTW.

Finally I want to say thanks to Sahib, my blogging partner and more importantly my best friend for over 30 years.  You are the smartest, funniest writer I know, and I can't wait to see what year 2 brings!





Saturday, August 11, 2012

Ryan Is Veep Choice, Crew Snubbed Again!




So I got the call late yesterday afternoon from the Romney campaign.  They thanked me for agreeing to be considered for the #2 slot on the GOP ticket, but said they were going with Paul Ryan instead.  Something about that Eddie Munster hair cut was just too good to pass up I guess.  I was mollified somewhat when they added "Crew, your work at SACSTW is just too important to the future of America to be distracted with being the Vice-President".

In all seriousness, the announcement this morning that Wisconsin Congressman Paul Ryan will be Romney's running mate is spectacularly encouraging news for this blogger.  Ryan is young (42), energetic, articulate, and oh by the way, brilliant!  Of course, as a white male conservative, I'm sure Dear Leader's campaign will paint Ryan as an evil woman-hating racist, but that is just standard operating procedure for the Democratic machine.

As chairman of the House Budget Committee, Ryan has been the conservative movement's point man in developing a plan to escape the morass of runaway deficits and grotesque federal spending.  He has offered a solid budget proposal ("The Path To Prosperity"), in stark opposition to the derelict U.S. Senate.  His enthusiasm, calm demeanor, and critical thinking skills make him a great choice to join the Romney campaign!

May I make a suggestion?  Mark October 11, 2012 on your calendar.  Keep that night free so you can watch the carnage that will be the Ryan-Biden Vice Presidential debate.  Somehow I don't think the smartest guy in Washington debating arguably the densest guy in Washington will be a fair fight, but it will be spectacular TV.   I am a little worried that Health and Human Services agents may try to arrest Ryan on charges of elder abuse in the midst of the debate, but it will still be a lot of fun.

Here's my prediction.  By the year 2028, as Paul Ryan's second term as President comes to an end, America will owe a great debt to the voters of Wisconsin who sent Ryan to Washington D.C. in the first place and allowed him to become a player on the national political scene.  Wisconsin......who da thunk it?

Wednesday, August 8, 2012

Geez, Being A Hoodlum Is Getting Tough These Days

Here is this week's nomination for American businessman of the year....love the way the neighborhood folks chip in to help out.


Monday, August 6, 2012

Monday Musings With The Crew


Now that chicken-palooza has died down a little bit, on with the countdown!

  • Another mass shooting took place yesterday at a Sikh temple near Milwaukee, WI.  Six people were killed and four wounded before police shot and killed the suspect, 40 year old Wade Michael Page.  Page, described as a U.S. Army veteran with "white-supremacist" tattoos, apparently lived in nearby Cudahy, WI.  This will probably turn out to be misdirected craziness by another ignorant mouthbreather, Sikhs have been targeted by anti-Islamists frequently since 9/11.  One interesting sidebar is how quickly this shooting was labeled "domestic terrorism" by government officials.  Contrast that with the 2009 killing of 13 people at Fort Hood by an "allahu akbar" shouting radical Islamist Nidal Hassan.  Almost 3 years later, that massacre is still officially just "workplace violence".  

That's not how Harry rides Stanley
  • So I just got off the phone with a highly placed staffer in Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid's office this morning.  Under strict conditions of anonymity, he told me that Senator Reid regularly forces himself on Stanley, Barack Obama's favorite unicorn late at night in the White House stables.  Evidently the violated Stanley was overheard by a stable boy pleading "Please stop Senator, I vote NEIGHHHHH" !  Don't believe me?  I have just as much evidence of Reid's unicoupling as he does for his claim that Mitt Romney hasn't paid any taxes over the last 10 years.  Reid's pathetic and immoral rumour mongering on the floor of the U.S. Senate (where he is immune from any blowback) is another example of one of the left's favorite mantras....."it's not the nature of the evidence, it's the seriousness of the charge".  Just ask Clarence Thomas, the Duke lacrosse team, Steven Pagones, Stanley, the list is endless.  



  • Oft-cited by anti-voter ID wonks, the Brennan Center for Justice claims 11% of eligible voters do not have a government issued photo ID.  Okey dokey, let's run some numbers for the state of Kansas.  Kansas passed a voter ID law in the last few months which has its first trial run with tomorrow's election.  There are 1.7 million registered voters in Kansas.  Let's round down to 10% to make the numbers easy....that means as many as 170,000 voters in Kansas don't have photo ID.  Obviously the  DMV offices in Kansas have been flooded with tens of thousands of voters seeking a FREE photo ID.  But wait Crew you say, some of those voters have no way to get to the DMV for the free ID.  OK, let's say that 90% of those 170,000 Kansans are incapable of getting to an office for their ID.  That still leaves 17,000 beating down the doors for their ID.  Um, not exactly.  Of those 170,000 Kansas voters that the Brennan Center claims are out there, a grand total of 32 have taken Kansas up on the offer of a free ID.  
  • The good news is that the Mars Rover landed safely on the red planet late last night.  The bad news is that Barack Obama wasn't on it.  

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Friday, August 3, 2012

Dude, Where's My Lesbian?

So I am sitting at my desk today, trying to decide what to do for lunch.  Then I remember about National Kiss A Lesbian day being today down at Chick-fil-A.  I think to myself, "Crew, that chicken sandwich you had on Wednesday in support of the U.S. Constitution was dang good, how about another one today".  Then it hits me.....what with this whole kiss a lesbian thing going on, I can have lunch AND scratch something off my bucket list all in one fell swoop!

So I get all excited over my prospects at Chick-fil-a, I mean I've got images swirling around in my head that frankly make it hard to concentrate on driving.  You know, like this......

I finally get there, and nothing!  Nary a lesbian to be found.  I go back to my car, squeeze into my Lillith Fair '98 T-shirt, and crank up the Elton John CD.  I figure when the lesbians show up, I'll be first in line for a kiss.  Thirty minutes go by, then sixty.  I got nothing.  Actually, that's not true.  I had a lovely conversation with this guy....

but we decided to just stay friends.  After wasting my whole lunch hour, I go into the Chick-fil-a to complain to the manager.  He is sympathetic, and says that he was told the lesbians weren't going to show until that evening.  Evidently, they were all up late last night watching the Olympics.  Diving, I suppose.  

Thursday, August 2, 2012

Liberal Tool Abuses Chick-fil-a Worker

Thanks Blazing Cat Fur for turning us on to this lefty nutbag spewing his venom on a drive-up window girl just trying to do her job at Chick-fil-a.  Well done young lady!


Holocaust: False Zionist Alleged Tragedy

This is why there will never be peace in the Middle East


Ziad Al-Bandak, the Palestinian president's adviser for religious affairs, places flowers at the Auschwitz death camp in Oswiecim, Poland, on July 27

Last week Ziad Al-Bandak, an adviser for religious affairs for Palestinian president Mahmoud Abbas, visited Auschwitz and left flowers. To most sane people, this would seem to be an olive branch offered and a display that could signal a potential to compromise for the good of all concerned. But as ESPN College Game Day analyst Lee Corso is fond of saying:  "Not so fast my friend!"

According to a Reuters story on NBC News, Hamas spokesman Fozzy Bear, sorry Fawzi Barhoum had this to say:
Hamas spokesman Fawzi Barhoum
"It was an unjustified and unhelpful visit that served only the Zionist occupation," and "a marketing of a false Zionist alleged tragedy." and that the visit came "at the expense of a real Palestinian tragedy."
I'm sure that 6 million murdered Jews would have loved to disagree with him. The real "Palestinian tragedy" Mr. Barhoum is that leaders like you continue to indoctrinate your people with messages of hate and blame as opposed to messages of peace and understanding.

I've said it before and I will say it again.  There will NEVER be peace in the Middle East until there is not a single Jew on a single square foot of land in the Holy Land.  Groups like Hamas and individuals like Mr. Barhoum continue to make my point.

Wednesday, August 1, 2012

Barack Obama- Panhandler In Chief

The man in the video below occupies the same office as men like George Washington, Thomas Jefferson, and Abraham Lincoln.  What do you suppose they would think of this little clip?  What's next, video of Obama sprawled out on Pennsylvania Ave, strumming a shabby guitar with a few quarters in the open case beside him?

Dear Leader claims "the way we win is we have a lot more supporters...".  Hey Barry, been to a Chick-fil-a today?


Emanuel and Menino Win Silver Hen!

Press Release
from the United States Poultry Producer Association

Poultry Industry Men Of The Year Award
Mayor Emanuel practices making chicken shadows with his hand in
one of his more lucid moments

Menino celebrates upon learning of his Silver Hen Award

The glorious Silver Hen Trophy
The United States Poultry Producer Association is pleased to announce the co-winners of the coveted Silver Hen Award for 2012.  Given to the individual(s) who have done the most to promote and encourage the consumption of poultry, the 2012 Silver Hen award goes to Rahm Emanuel, mayor of Chicago, and Tom Menino, mayor of Boston.  

Recently, Dan Cathy, the president of ChickFilA expressed his support for "the biblical" definition of marriage and family.  Reacting with predictable outrage, Mssrs. Emanuel and Menino lashed out at the privately held company.  Emanuel was quoted as saying "ChickFilA values are not Chicago values", and Menino sent a missive to Mr. Cathy admonishing him and advising him there is no place in Boston for ChickFilA.

After news of these comments spread across the nation, supporters of ChickFilA and lovers of free speech, conservative values, and white meat struck back.  Designating today, August 1st, as "Support ChickFilA" day, they descended on the company's 1,608 stores in droves.  Across the country, long lines of American freedom lovers waited for up to 90 minutes to express their support for private business by sinking their teeth into a juicy chicken sandwich.  
Inside a mall in Kansas City

Philadelphia

South Carolina traffic waiting to get to ChickFilA

Congratulations to Mayors Emanuel and Menino, for all their hard work and lunacy that resulted in the single greatest day in the history of the chicken sandwich!