Tuesday, February 28, 2012

If You Want a Palestine, How About Hispanstine?

"Official" Flag of Hispanstine
This weekend I had a lively discussion with a former state department employee who spent 21 years in garden spots like Iraq, Egypt, and Yemen.  His view of our role and status in the world was unsurprising, yet discouraging.

After discussing Iraq, Afghanistan, and Iran (He believes the Iranians are bluffing and really don't want war with Israel.) our conversation turned to the Israeli/Palestinian conflict.

Sitting in that converted warehouse watching kids play indoor soccer, the heavens opened up and I had an epiphany.  I have been wrong my entire adult life.  Yes devoted readers, your beloved Sahib has been WRONG.

My previous post about a "Palestinian State?  Just Say No" was misguided and hateful.  It makes no difference that there has never in the history of the world been a Palestine.  Who cares if the British Mandate in Palestine was divided 75% the for Arabs living in that region and 25% for the Jews with the 75% being called Trans-Jordan?  The Palestinian people shouldn't have to move one foot away from where their ancestors lived.  It is irrelevant that genetic analysis suggests that the Palestinians are descendants of Christians and Jews from Southern Levant and that it was not until the Muslim conquests of the 7th century that they "willingly" converted to Islam.  They believe they are a unique and individual people and they deserve their own country exactly where their ancestors lived.  That a large portion of them were nomadic is of no consequence.

My conversion led to another epiphany (I was very epiphanated this weekend).  There is another group of disenfranchised people living much closer to us.  They too deserve.... nay, are ordained by divine right to have their own nation.  I of course are referring to the Hispantinian people.

Today, I start my campaign to begin the annexation of the US states of New Mexico and California for the creation of the new nation of Hispanstine.  I will be submitting my proposal to the United Nations this week. I propose Los Angeles as the capitol.  I mean really... if the Jews shouldn't mind sharing Jerusalem, Hollywood shouldn't mind sharing Los Angeles.  I will also be submitting an application for official refugee status for all Hispanic people living anywhere in the world who can prove (or at least pinkie-swear they are telling the truth) that some relative, at some time, in the past, lived in what is now known as the southern United States.

The United States will be encouraged/pressured/threatened/blackmailed into providing material, medical, and financial support.  Hispantinians will be allowed to work in the United States without interference from the US government.  Allowances will be made for any slight indiscretions made by the Hispantinian people such as rocket attacks, mortar attacks, or suicide bombers perpetrated against their former/current oppressors.

SACSTW followers!  Join me in supporting the brand new nation of Hispanstine, kindred spirits to their brothers and sisters across the world in Palestine!

Please excuse me... *sob*.... just a little emotionally overwhelmed...


  1. I move we cede the entire contents of our wallets and bank accounts to the Hispantines.... oh wait.... that's already been done. TY for your multiple epi-fanies. We who are about to die salute U.

  2. Thanks Melissa! Glad you enjoyed it.