Physics Lessons for our Wacky North Korean Friends

North Korean Nuclear Missile Transportation System

Our fun-loving friends, the North Koreans, have never let silly things like the laws of physics get in the way of their grand aspirations.  Even faced with setback after setback, the sunny North Koreans are ever optimistic.  After last April's abysmal rocket failure, the latest Dear Leader Kim Jong-un was unfazed and went to atomic warhead delivery system Option 2 shown below:

Atomic warhead delivery Option 2

Of course this presupposes that a North Korean atomic device will even detonate.  We have all seen this atomic test video smuggled out of North Korea by NBC operatives:




One wonders how a country that spends so much time and so many resources on their military can struggle so consistently to develop a simple atomic bomb and a way to share it with their South Korean cousins.  I mean come on, if the Pakistanis can do it, how hard can it be????

Well, after reading North Korean Vice Foreign Minister Pak Kil Yon's comments to the UN, I think I have it figured out.  This quote explained it all:

"Today, due to the continued U.S. hostile policy towards the DPRK," Pak said, "the vicious cycle of confrontation and aggravation of tension is an ongoing phenomenon on the Korean peninsula, which has become the world's most dangerous hotspot where a spark of fire could set off a thermonuclear war."

The North Koreans have stolen the wrong sets of plans!  They stole them from Wile E. Coyote, Super Genius:

I'm no nuclear physicist, but even I know that you don't use a match to set off a thermonuclear bomb.

Is Obama an Idiot? (about Iran)

I've decided that my oldest son, Sahib Jr., should be the Secretary of State.  Being as he is only 12, we could have potential child labor issues, but he definitely would cut through the crap.  He asked me the other day, "Dad, what's all this stuff about Iran and atomic bombs?"  He did a National History Day project on the bombing of Hiroshima and Nagasaki and is interested in the topic.  I outlined the situation and asked his opinion.  He replied, "They're stalling."  I asked him to explain.  He said, "It's like in wrestling when I'm up big on a stronger kid late in the match.  As long as I don't do something dumb and get pinned, I'm gonna win.  So I stall.  That's what they are doing."

And there you have it devoted readers... wisdom from the mouths of babes.  (Please no one tell him I referred to him as a "babe"!)  The question I have is that if a 12 year old (albeit geopolitically brilliant one like his old man) can figure it out, why can't the president backed by the "genius" of the State Department?  I know you lefties out there have changed your mantra of  "Give Peace a Chance!" from the '60s to "Give Sanctions a Chance!" today.  Just one question:  When have sanctions worked?  EVER? Hmmmmmmmmm?

Which can only leave us with one of two conclusions:

1. The President and his advisers are idiots.
2. They have some reason to help Iran stall an attack from Israel until they have a working atomic bomb.

Either of these possibilities scares the peewaden out of me.  Here's to hoping the following video is an analogy for what Israel is about to do to Iran.  The big kid (Israel) restrains himself for fear of getting in trouble with the teachers (US, Europe, Russia, et. al.).  The little a**hole kid (Iran) keeps picking on the big kid (Israel) "knowing" he won't fight back.  Enjoy viewing the results.

Hopefully the "cut the crap" wisdom of kids will trump the politically correct stupidity of adults.

Retirement of a Cold War Hero

Sahib and The Crew pay homage to the last remaining member of an unsung group of Cold War veterans.  This particular group of heroes stood silent vigil over our sleeping families for more than 50 years.  Protested, criticized, berated, and ostracized, you asked nothing in return and never a complaint passed your lips. (Not that you have lips, but you get the point.)

So it is with heavy heart that we say goodbye to last B53 nuclear bomb.  

The B53:  The Kremlin Attention Getter

The last of its Armageddon-thwarting brethren, this bad-boy weighs in at a sleek 10,000 pounds and is roughly the size of a minivan.  The Federation of American Scientists reports that the B53 is 600 times more powerful than the atomic bomb dropped on Hiroshima.  Sahib and The Crew like to refer to them as “The Kremlin Attention Getters” or Commie Whoppers for short.

According to a Fox News article, the last B53 is currently being disassembled at the Pantex Plant near Amarillo, Texas. (Gee, and maybe we can provide the terrorists Mapquest directions to the place as well.)  Apparently, this process requires a bit more effort than stripping a car at a local chop-shop. “Since it was made using older technology by engineers who have since retired or died, developing a disassembly process took time. Engineers had to develop complex tools and new procedures to ensure safety.” (Does this bother anyone besides me? You would think someone might have thought to take a few notes or a snapshot or two.)

So farewell, paladin of the skies above our nation, and thank you for the thankless service you performed.   Those on the left who slept under the blanket of freedom you provided may not miss you, but Sahib and The Crew certainly will.