Monday Musings With The Crew

• Breaking News:  The Vatican announced that Pope Benedict XVI would resign the papacy effective Feb. 28, becoming the first Pope to do so since Gregory XII in 1415.  Benedict's successor will be elected by a conclave of cardinals, which interestingly enough is exactly how I got this job.  

• Here's a question.....if the proper term is "African-American", why is February "Black" History month?

Give Mommy a little smoochie!

• Kimberly Margeson raised a few eyebrows at a New York prison by laying an open-mouth kiss on her incarcerated son's mouth during a recent visit.  Was she just a little more lusty than current societal norms permit?  Not exactly.  She was actually passing sonny boy a few oxycodone pills via the lip-lock.  It's weird....she doesn't look anything like Alicia Silverstone!

• It's official....I'm an old geezer.  I listened to the radio news guy list the big winners at last night's Grammy Awards, and I didn't recognize a single act.  

• Nancy Pelosi made another remarkably incoherent appearance on Fox News Sunday this weekend.  A couple of the highlights...

• She blamed the current sluggish economy on the previous administration.  I'm pretty sure she meant the one before that.
• When host Chris Wallace asked Pelosi about gun control, the sage of San Francisco said this...  "We avow the First Amendment, we stand with that and say that people have the right to have a gun and defend themselves".  I feel much better knowing that great Constitutional scholars like Pelosi are entrusted with protecting my rights.  

• In direct contrast with the idiot Pelosi is SecDef Leon Panetta.  Although he is on the opposite side of the political aisle from me, I've always found Panetta to be an earnest and thoughtful man.  His recent testimony in front of the Senate about the attack in Benghazi was remarkable.  Here is a clip of him answering Sen. Ayotte's (R-NH) questions about Dear Leader's involvement that night.  Take a look....

You can hear in his voice and see in his face the pain and disgust that Obama's dereliction of duty gives him.  Obama showed absolutely no interest in the fact that our consulate was under attack, and our Ambassador and 3 other brave Americans had been murdered.  Five years ago, I would have said that it wasn't possible for the President of the United States to be so callous and disconnected.  Today, in SecondTermica, it barely makes a ripple.  We take a lot of jabs at Dear Leader here at SACSTW, but that 2 minutes of video is all you need to know what a loathsome, traitorous human being currently inhabits our White House.

Monday Musings With The Crew

Fresh off a weekend of seclusion at the SACSTW Ozark hideaway, I have emerged to bring you yet another edition of Monday Musings.

• From the "We Didn't Really Think This Through" Department:  Animal rights activists from Showing Animals Respect and Kindness (SHARK) planned to document a South Carolina pigeon shoot by filming it from a remotely controlled micro helicopter.  Hmmm, harassing hunters with a small flying object.  When participants in the pigeon shoot heard about the plans, the event quickly morphed into a "micro-helicopter shoot".  Shortly after SHARK launched their drone, it was blasted out of the sky by numerous shotgun rounds.  By the way, is SHARK really the best acronym for a group concerned about treating animals with respect and kindness?

• More fun animal news....   Remember the spotted owl?  It was the original darling of the enviro-animal rights-down with industry whack jobs back in the 80's.  The Obama administration has developed a new  plan to save the spotted owl.....by killing all the other owls.  It seems that more aggressive barred owls are displacing their spotted cousins from their preferred environment.  The feds have decided to gun down barred owls over the next few years in another attempt to save the spotted owl.  It seems that (with apologies to Mr. Orwell) all owls are equal, but some owls are more equal than others.  

Spotted Owl Gooood

Barred Owl... Baaaaadddd

• A quick report on the Crew's congressman, the odious Emanuel Cleaver.  The former Kansas City mayor turned U.S. Congressman (and chairman of the Congressional Black Caucus by the way) is being sued by Bank of America for defaulting on a 1.5 million dollar loan on a carwash business in the Kansas City area.  Just another notch in Manny's long history of questionable financial dealings.  The kicker here is that you and I are on the hook for the bill.  The carwash loan has an SBA guarantee, meaning the US taxpayer will foot 75% of the bill.  Shockingly, the congressman has had no comment on the issue.

• To continue the animal theme today (hey, I just spent the weekend out in the woods), have you heard that Alicia Silverstone is supplementing her fading movie career by opening a daycare operation in her home?  SACSTW has obtained video of lunchtime........

That's all the fun and frivolity for this morning....please remember to like us on Facebook and follow us on Twitter.  Keep the comments coming!

Hollywood HOs: Alicia Silverstone

And you thought Morgan Freeman dating his granddaughter was creepy...

Hollywood HOs

WARNING:  Do NOT read this while eating your breakfast, lunch, dinner, or snack!  In fact, after reading this, you probably won't want to eat for a week.

I know SACSTW fans expected this week's Hollywood Hall of Shame winner to be either Spike Lee or Roseanne Barr.  In most weeks, you would have been correct.  No devoted readers, this week's winner put the EWWWWWW in spew.  This week's Hollywood HOs winner is Alicia Silverstone.

As if naming her spawn Bear Blu wasn't bad enough, she premasticates for her 10 month old son. (For KCMO public school students - Mastication:   The process by which food is chewed or ground by teeth.)  Premastication is where the food is chewed by one person and then spit into the mouth of another.  Apparently, things have not been going well career-wise for Ms. Silverstone and she cannot afford a blender or food processor.  For those of you with a stout heart and iron stomach, you can view the video below:



Here's what Ms. Silverstone, a vegan, had to say about this on her website:

"I just had a delicious breakfast of miso soup, collards and radish steamed and drizzled with flax oil, cast iron mochi with nori wrapped outside, and some grated daikon. Yum! I fed Bear the mochi and a tiny bit of veggies from the soup…from my mouth to his. It’s his favorite...and mine. He literally crawls across the room to attack my mouth if I’m eating. This video was taken about a month or 2 ago when he was a bit wobbly. Now he is grabbing my mouth to get the food!"

She had me at "drizzled with flax oil"...  I really hope she is putting away the money she is saving by not buying MEAT to pay for the decades of therapy this poor boy is going to need.  Ms. Silverstone, and I speak for everyone, please make any future movies/videos in which you star... "Spewless".  I shudder to think the process she used to breastfeed.

Now that we are all indelibly scarred, I hope everyone has a wonderful meat-filled weekend.  But please, everyone chew for themselves.