Democrats: "World To End Tomorrow"

Well folks, it's been a lot of fun to write SACSTW over the couple years.  We have documented and satirized the inanity we all swim through every day, but it looks like the end is nigh.  At least according to the Democrats.

Those who were of school-age during the Cold War, remember all those "hide under your desk from ballistic missile attack" drills?  What a waste of time, the world isn't going to end in some sort of nuclear conflagration after all.

Remember all the hubbub about the end of the Mayan Calendar and the complete destruction of society that was supposed to happen on Dec. 21, 2012???   Pshaw!  The Mayans had nothing on the GOP!  At least according to the Democrats.

Yes folks, tomorrow, March 1 2013, the end of the world as we know it (TEOTWAWKI) will be upon us. The instrument of our destruction?    A 1.2% federal spending cut.  Wait, it gets worse....It's not really a cut in spending.  It is a cut in the spending increases scheduled for this year.

Look at it this way.  Let's say you make $1000 a week at your job.  This year, your pay was supposed to increase to $1100 a week.  The boss comes to you and says..."Sorry Joe Worker, we are only going to be able to increase your pay to $1086 a week this year".  AAGGGHHH!!! you say.  It's TEOTWAWKI!!!!

I would say to you "Joe, instead of howling about TEOTWAWKI, you should be on your knees thanking the boss that you still have a job, let alone one that is going to pay you more this year than last".  Particularly in light of SACSTW favorite Maxine Waters's comments about the effects of sequestration on the US labor force......

Please note Mad Maxine's claim that sequestration will cost the United States "170 million" jobs.  I really hate to bother the lovely and erudite Rep. Waters, but at any one time the US labor force numbers about 155 million.  So.......every single one of you still working out there will lose their jobs because of sequestration. In addition, 15 million of you are going to have to then go and get another job and lose it in order to satisfy Mad Maxine's predictions.  Sorry Max, math is a real bitch sometimes.  

Then there is Rep. Donna "I'll see your 170 million lost jobs and raise you millions of brutalized women" Edwards, D-MD.  In the video here, you can hear her explain how 230,000 calls to domestic violence shelters will go unanswered due to the GOP and sequestration.  Note how at the end, she ups the ante to "millions of women and children", nicely done Donna!

Obviously, domestic violence is a terrible thing.  I don't know about 230,000 calls in the middle of the night going unanswered in the future.  I do know of one in the recent past that went unanswered......the one Ambassador Chris Stevens made to Barack Obama's administration pleading for help as Islamic terrorists savaged him and 3 other brave Americans in Benghazi on Sept. 11, 2012.  What I don't remember seeing is outrage from Donna and Maxine about that unanswered call.  

Monday Musings With The Crew

This week's edition of Monday Musings has it all....sex, violence, insanity..... and maybe, just maybe...my all time favorite video clip!  Here we go!

• We've all been there right?  Driving around with your significant other, and idle chitchat turns into a heated argument.  That's what happened in Florida recently to Yvonne Martinez and her boyfriend, Ricardo Davis.  Things escalated a little past the norm for these two however, and the discussion ended when Davis bit off his girl's left thumb and spit it out onto the floorboard of the car.  What kind of choppers must this guy have?  Yikes!

• Speaking of toothy creatures on the loose, 15,000 head of livestock from a South African farm escaped last week due to floodwaters from a nearby river.  Did I mention it was a crocodile farm?  A spokesman for the largest U.S. crocodile farm said this kind of thing could never happen to them because..."The Potomac will never rise far enough to threaten Capitol Hill".  

• Wrangler has introduced a line of jeans that contain moisturizers like apricot oil and shea butter in the fabric.  Reputed to reduce itchy dry skin during the winter, the "spa denim" jeans are available for women only at this time.  Wrangler is considering a men's line of the jeans, no word yet on whether they will be packaged together with a white tube sock.  

• This is Mikel Ruffinelli.   The Los Angeles woman was recently certified by the World Record Academy as having the world's largest hips.  All I can really say about this is the folks at the World Record Academy need to spend some more time at WalMart.  Ms. Ruffinelli is a bronze medalist at best.  

• More crocodile news....A Minnesota lawyer has had his law license suspended after he had a torrid affair with a woman he was representing in a divorce case.  Oh yeah, he also billed the woman for the time they spent having sex.  While his law license is suspended, Thomas Lowe plans to combine his two careers and see clients at the Bunny Ranch in Las Vegas. 

• And here it is, maybe my all time favorite video clip.....   All of us learned as youngsters that nature can be harsh and violent.  You know, watching the leopard drag down the gazelle on Wild Kingdom, or even seeing the neighbor's cat pluck a sparrow from a shrub.  All of us that is....except this guy...........

Somewhere....Lennie Small is screaming!