Hollywood HOs: 'Don't Want No Retard Baby' Margaret Cho

Hollywood HOs

Once again it was a dog-fight for this week's Hollywood HOs winner.  It was a battle of clueless versus vile and vile won out.  Kathie Lee Gifford was the runner-up with her interview of Martin Short where she commented on how great of a marriage they have and asked how long they've been married.  Martin Short's wife died of ovarian cancer in 2010.  As clueless and self-serving as Kathie Lee is, it wasn't malicious.  And we nominate Martin Short for Hollywood Hall of FAME for his classy handling of the issue.  He didn't bust her on live TV.  Being the evil person I am, I would have said: "You want to know our secret?  She never talks back."  I know it would have been WRONG, but that's just me.

Hollywood HOS Cho

But I digress.  Without further adieu, this week's winner is another classy lady in the proud tradition of previous Hollywood HOs Cher, Hanoi Jane Fonda, Roseanne Barr, and Sarah Silverman. Congratulations Margaret Cho!  She had these wonderfully sensitive things to say recently on Bravo:

“My period comes like twice a month. My eggs are jumping ship,” she said. “Seriously, they’re like, ‘the last one out’s a retard.”

“I get worried about that, as an older woman, I don’t necessarily want to have a retard,” she said.

You want your kid to have the best chance at life,” she added. “I’m trying [to get pregnant]. It’s hard for a lesbian.”

 And there you have it devoted readers, another one of those lovable "quirky" Hollywood types. And guess what boys and girls?  She's married.... to a straight guy...

 "It's not a traditional situation. It's not a committed marriage. We're just friends who share space. My parents don't understand it. They just send us Yahoo E-cards wishing us well." 

And she had this to say about voting rights for prisoners:

"It is tragic that people who are incarcerated are unable to vote. They are probably the most important voices to listen to because they can tell us what we need to change. Yet they are arbitrarily silenced, as if forfeiting their right to vote punishes them. In truth, it punishes the rest of us because it turns the right into a privilege. Whenever privilege is introduced, there are problems. We cannot afford any more problems." 

My goodness, where was she when I was single?  Have a great weekend everyone!

Hollywood HOs Winner: Sarah Silverman Edges John (t)Ravolta

Hollywood HOs

Deciding this week's Hollywood HOs winner was exceedingly difficult.  I spent countless seconds trying to decide between John (t)Ravolta and Sarah Silverman.  It came down to the fact that propriety and decorum prevent me from writing any of my thoughts about the plethora of John (t)Ravota stories on a family friendly blog.

So without further adieu, this week's Hollywood HOs winner is the ever-classy Sarah Silverman.

Such a classy lady!

I know Ms. Silverman is a D-lister at best, but her tweet about the Tea Party could not go unrewarded. She had this to say:

"The Tea Party is just a (female pubic) hair away from being the Westboro Baptist Church ~ Maya Angelou"

For those of you unfamiliar with the Westboro Baptist Church, it is the church in Topeka, Kansas founded by Fred Phelps that protests fallen servicemen's funerals with protest signs that are beyond vile.  When judgement day arrives, Fred Phelps is in for a very rude awakening. What Maya Angelou has to do with Ms. Silverman's tweet, only her fevered brain could say.

Thank you Ms. Silverman for keeping up the proud tradition of venomous hatred perpetrated by previous Hollywood HOs winners Ellen Barkin, Jane Fonda, and Cher.

OK.  I can't resist.  Just one John (t)Ravolta joke:  "I guess Sandy's leather pants were just too tight so Danny had to settle for Kenickie's."  Mom, please forgive me.

Can We Please Ease Up on the Nazis?

Let me get this out of the way before anyone misconstrues this post...

I am a staunch defender of Israel and the Jewish people. The Jews are God's chosen people. You mess with them and you experience "grief and woe of Biblical proportions." (Pun intended.) Don't believe me? How are those Egyptian, Babylonian, Chaldean, Persian, Roman, British, and Third Reich empires working out for everyone? The Nazi "Final Solution" to the "Jewish Problem" is probably the most definitive example of evil incarnate in modern times. Followed closely by communist/socialist stalwarts "Smoking" Joe Stalin and Mao Zedong re-educating their own people to death.

That being said, can we please ease up on the whole Nazi thing? It is getting old and tired. When Rush came up with Feminazis, at least he was original. The Soup Nazi was hilarious on Seinfeld. I affectionately refer to friend of SACSTW, Rabbit, as the Grammar Nazi. But really, enough is enough. Quit referring to every person you disagree with politically as a Nazi. Last week, "Hanoi" Jane Fonda and her has-been buddies chastised Rush for being mean and calling Sandra Fluke names, and then proceeded to call him a Nazi. Not that I expect anything less from the comedically challenged left, but come on! There has to be at least one creative and funny mentally deranged lefty out there. (And no Bill Maher, you are not that person.)

Be funny. Be original. Think of something new. For my conservative friends, the possibilities of satirical comparisons for Obama and his minions of insufficient light are legion. Quit being lazy. Come up with something fresh.

Next item on the Nazi agenda: Can we please stop the self-flagellation every time someone makes an oblique reference to WWII Germans? Case in point, David Axelrod (no, I'm not a fan) referred to Romney's media campaign in Illinois as a Mittzkrieg. This was actually quite clever in my opinion. But right on cue, people have immediately called on him to apologize for making Holocaust references.

Huh? As an amateur World War II historian, Blitzkrieg is the anglicized word for "Lightning War". It is a military strategy, and not even one originated by the Germans. It is an all-motorized force concentration of tanks, infantry, artillery, combat engineers, and air power. The first European general to introduce rapid movement, concentrated power and integrated military effort was Swedish King Gustavus Adolphus during the 30 year war. Yes, the Germans did use the strategy in WWII, and yes, the Germans also perpetrated the Holocaust, but the connection between German military strategy and the systematic mass-murder of Jewish civilians by the German government is tenuous at best.

Holocaust survivors survived HITLER! I imagine they are made of sterner stuff than to let a tangential reference to WWII German military strategy wound them. HOWEVER, if any Holocaust survivors are emotionally hurt by such references, the person making them should apologize. They have dealt with enough. But I want to hear it from them, not from any political organization. Not even one I agree with.

I guess the moral of this story is:  No more Nazis please!

Hollywood HOs: Hanoi Jane!

Hollywood HOs

Apparently, the old adage that "you can't teach an old dog to love freedom" has been proven true once again.  Perennial SACSTW favorite "Hanoi" Jane Fonda is this week's Hollywood HOs winner. Before we get into this week's vehemently anti-American activity, let me refresh your memories with a few blasts from her past.

Ms. Fonda gazing lovingly at a North Vietnamese gun crew

Jane with ex-hubby explaining how American POW's are being  well-treated

In addition to these lovely images, I have always been extremely fond of this quote from her speech at the University of Michigan on November 21, 1970:

 "If you understood what communism was, you would hope, you would pray on your knees that we would some day become communist." 

She followed it up with this gem in a speech at Duke Univsersity:

"I, a socialist, think that we should strive toward a socialist society, all the way to communism. "  

So, fast-forward to March, 2012.  This fan of freedom and liberty lover Ho Chi Minh's poetry, has decided that the first-amendment right of free speech should be revoked for those people she doesn't like. Jane, along with fellow aging activists Gloria Steinem and Robin Morgan, have put out a petition to have the FCC not renew the license of any radio station that continues to air the Rush Limbaugh show.

Devoted readers, not even I, your beloved Sahib, concentrating all my massive creative energies could have written something that matches this doozie from this triumvirate of moonbat loons:

"He promotes language that deliberately dehumanizes his targets,"  

And as a Texas-sized asteroid of delicious irony hurtles towards their pin-like heads , they follow it up with:

"Like the sophisticated propagandist Joseph Goebbels, he creates rhetorical frames -- and the bigger the lie, the more effective -- inciting listeners to view people they disagree with as subhumans." 

For those of you who struggle, as I do, with the "nuanced" liberal thought processes, the scientists at the SACSTW labs have invented The Universal Liberal Bombast to Sane Person Language Translator.  Here is the translation of their statement:

"It was very mean of Rush to compare that young woman's actions to those of a slut and a prostitute.  Calling people mean names de-humanizes them and shouldn't be allowed.  Rush is a Nazi."

Thank you, thank you, thank you, Jane Fonda.  As long as there are celebrities and politicians like you out there, we will never want for new blog material.